New hobbies.
Tonight we are going to a holiday party for Dane’s new place of business. The party is being held at the Academy of Sciences at Golden Gate Park and it’s going to be nice and fancy and shiny and merry.
The problem is…the problem is…THE PROBLEM IS…I am more than a little bit socially retarded right now.
You mean, you weren’t retarded before, you say? Very funny, mister and missus Zach Galifinakasnuffalupagus, but while yes, I was mildly socially downsy before, I am now a full blown, helmet wearing, special needs, social misfit.
I spend DAYS talking to no one other than Dane and maybe Sam, the guy who supports my Diet Coke addiction by selling it to me. What an asshole.
I mean, guys seriously, you should have heard me attempting to talk to Roxy, my new hair stylist about um…okay we talked about cats. WHAT?
Oh my God. I talked about cats to my hair stylist for well over an hour. I am so ashamed.
I’ve lost all perspective on what it means to be a good conversationalist and honestly, if we aren’t talking about YouTube videos of girls doing their hair (it’s my new fetish) or the upcoming Battlestar Galactica Season Premier (OMFG) then I probably will stop listening to you and commence staring at the wall and thinking about eyeliner and/or burritos.
And my main problem (besides being wholly self-involved and a little boring right now) is that I can’t drink anymore. After one and a half drinks, the headache sets in and I start whining under my breath about wanting to go home. I’m a wicked awesome good time, yes.
I hate the new social Kiala. So if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go into my bedroom, cut myself and put a video of it up on the YouTube because NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME.
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13 comments
maybe you need a job? that might help a little with the retardedness and self-absorption. or maybe it’s just me that needs a job to help with extended burrito monologues in my mind.
OMFG, indeed.
Don’t worry. It’ll all get better soon as we all find out wtf happened to Earth and see how this all works out.
Maybe you should start a livejournal too? And do nothing but post the angsty videos there?
But no, things get better. Get out of your house and interact with people – baby steps.
You’ll feel better after the Christmas par-taaaaaaaay. You have to call it that to make it feel better.
Also, what is up with the hangover? It’s like torture, for realz.
Socializing is over-rated.
I just spent a week a the Hilton in Eugene where I only left our hotel room to see the symphony and to get some sushi. Otherwise, I was alone in the gym or hanging out with Liam. It was awesome.
zombiez!
okay, i am seriously going to make you meet me and hang out with me. even if you don’t talk to me. we can drink hot cocoa instead of wine. not that it’s really cold enough for that here, but whatever. we’ll do it. and talk about our cats.
Gatorade. Drink a large-ish bottle of Gatorade before drinking. FOR REALZ.
Something like 90% of all headaches are caused by dehydration. Just think of it as your new pre-funk.
You need to get some sort of dunkie job, just to get you out of the house.
I don’t really know what dunkie means because I just made it up.
I hear you. I have completely lost the art of conversation. I recently had my hoochie waxed and spent the entire time talking about my dog’s christmas party.
so hey, how was the freaking party??? did you walk around with both feet in your mouth the whole time?
You mean my cats aren’t a healthy topic of conversation? Uh oh…
Dude, jobs don’t help. Or at least my job where I hang out with old people all day doesn’t help. I just continue with the awkwardness only now I do it AT REALLY LOUD VOLUMES.
And I hear you on the hangovers. I went to see a bunch of friends for a Christmas pub crawl this past Saturday and spent 2 hours in the middle drinking glass after glass of water. Then I went home to eat a sandwich at midnight.
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