I’m not very good at recycling.
But I am excellent at hoarding.
About Kiala Kazebee
I'm Kiala Kazebee and I made this blog for you. What did you make for me?
I live inPortland, ORSan Francisco, CAPortland, OR with my husband Dane Hesseldahl. I write for Village Voice Media and the Portland Mercury because they let me.
I are a genus.
contact meRSS
-
Pictures
Subscribe to my RSS Feed
-
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
7 comments
heh Looks like our pantry. We have about 11.8 million reusable bags from various places sitting in there that we always forget to bring out with us.
And if we do something “smart” like throwing them in the back of the car so we won’t forget them next time, we end up taking the other vehicle instead. I are smart.
I have that same bag that says “I used to be a plastic bottle.”
Even the bags from Whole Foods are fucking smug.
Who remembers to bring those things anyway? Who? My cats use mine for sleeping.
On Monday at Trader Joes, the checker put all my food in paper bags and put shampoo (just that, and yes I use Trader Joe’s shampoo — cheap and no sodium laureth sulfates) in a plastic bag and then into one of the paper bags. What a waste!
I told her that I didn’t need or want that plastic bag and she said, “it’s good to plastic bag these sort of items.” I said that it gave me an extra unwanted plastic bag. And she said, “the bottle will pop open and shampoo will get everywhere. Trust me.” And I told her that was okay if it happened (because it never does) and that I have too many plastic bags at home as it is. And she said, “use them for trash bags!” What a genius, right? Ugh, so I explained how I already do this with all the bags that I get from other stores like Target and Vons. And (to point out exactly what she was doing) I told her how Vons is the worst because they always put single items in plastic bags. And she said, while removing the shampoo from the plastic bag, “to each their own. Everyone has a different way of doing things. It’s alright, we’re all different.”
FURY!
She made me mad! Telling me lies about bottles bursting, suggesting the obvious way to reuse plastic bags, insisting that I take the bag, acting like I was the irrational one because I didn’t want the extra waste.
I felt like I got way too worked up and made too big of a deal of of this. I should have just removed the shampoo from the bag myself like I’d usually do.
Yesterday I went back to Trader Joe’s and did not get in her line.
The end.
I talked with the checker shortly after Isabelle’s experience, and she told me the real story. She said that the certain individual (Isabelle) was emitting such an obnoxious gas that the checker was concerned that she was about to expel an offensive substance. The checker noticed Isabelle’s car keys, and deduced that she was indeed driving a car. She deftly suggest edcarrying a plastic bag in addition to the bags you had because (frankly) she was worried you were about to poo the seat. If she didn’t detect your car keys, she would have offered the standard rubber shorts that Trader Joe’s employees’ offer all bikers/joggers/walkers when an expert checker detects the future smell of a major plop.
This comment was written under the influence.
Ari and I have about 57 of these tote things. The TJ’s person is always impressed with us when we hand them over, which makes me feel better about myself and forget that I have a job that makes me cry on the inside.
Robert
Leave a Comment