We made it out alive. BARELY.
Last night was so weird that by the time we made it out of the movie screening around 8:45 and over to BJ’s Bar and Kill Grill (or whatever), I was what a medical professional might have described as hysterical. The movie was honestly so bad, it was incomprehensible, and the guy running the screening was a little miffed at me because we showed up at like 2 minutes to 7 which is rude, I guess. But I’m SORRY. It’s not like I was late and MY GOD THAT MAN SHOULD HAVE BEEN APOLOGIZING TO ME. In fact, he should have rubbed my feet and brought me figs and iced tea while he was apologizing because the movie was so god awful. It was offensively horrible. I think that movie gave me PTSD. For real.
Anyway, I was in a real state, as my grandmother would have said, when Justin and Megan picked us up outside the theater and by the time we pulled up to the bar/shack/future place where our dead bodies would be found, seeing this on the bumper of someone’s SUV DID NOT HELP.
So the place was a little smaller than our bedroom and this was the KJ. On the serious. He actually turned out to be really, really nice.
Clackamas KJs: A breed apart
And here is me singing Cuts Like a Knife. I love Bryan Adams.
I pretty much cleared the room. All three feet of it.
Kiala: It feels so right
Makers and Diet Coke: A Portrait
And here is where I prove my love to you, my Frookies (thanks Crissy!), by posting this picture of myself where I look like a man in drag because the woman (?) behind me is so FUCKING AWESOME with that lighter. Right?
Two inches closer and it all could have gone horribly, horribly wrong.
And then Dane sang some Tenacious D (Tribute). It pretty much ruled.
Dane: Ruling. Pretty Much.
Megan agreed with the ruling. And Justin was distraught at the thought of following him. So he didn’t. Everyone understood.
Emotions. So many of them all at once.
And here you will see two ladies dancing. You’ll note how different this looks in comparison to when orange girls in tight jeans dance together.
Ladies love to dance. Not just the orange ones.
I don’t know what else to say about last night, other than that BJ’s was either the best or the most worstest ( I KNOW THAT IS WRONG) place I’ve ever been.
And now I need to nurse my mild hangover with eight diet cokes and some sushi.
Good Day!
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18 comments
That guy also needed to provide eunuchs to fan you with palm fronds, and other eunuchs to rub you with chocolate, and yet more eunuchs to drop the figs and grapes into your mouth.
I feel like Dane’s ruling is a little understated. Tenacious D will have to call it quits, because all future performances will pale in comparison.
I got SIDS from a movie once.
Who is that in that last picture, a train conductor in a back brace? Those pictures remind me of Ray’s Exciting Tattle Tale Room (except with more white people), which we would totally go to if you and Dane came to visit.
I was just going to say that it reminds me of the Tattle Tale Room!!!
Please tell me you or someone you were with played at least one game of Big Buck Hunter.
Please!!!
Matt- Goddamn right.
Megan- I agree!!!
Robert- Is there, like, a shot for that? Or do your roommates check on you every 3 minutes and make sure you’re not sleeping on your back?
Charley- I want to go to that place!
Isabelle- I want to go to that place!
Chris- No, but my GOD PEOPLE, do you see that giant flip flop on the ceiling? How did I not notice that before? Anyway, I’m sorry, no we didn’t Chris.
Do you get to say what movie you went to go see?
You should check out the karaoke at Sassy Jack’s. I think they’ve got it on Friday and Saturday nights. World class.
I don’t know if I can or can’t. I would if I could, though. It’ll be out in next week’s Merc. I’ll give you a link when it does. SO BAD. IT WAS SO BAD.
Where is Sassy Jack’s?
oh. my.
do you have any idea where can i find that blue outfit?
(and it totally looks like she is trying to ignite your hair)
Sassy Jacks is at SE 80th and Stark. They don’t have the hard booze, but there’s a bar across the street that does.
Sadly the best west coast karaoke is gone now that the Sunset Bowling Alley in Seattle is torn down.
You let me know the next time Dane is going to bust out The D. I’m prepared to provide him with the liquid courage necessary to bring that out of him.
You know Dane is totally ruling when he’s got a single digit pointed in the air, and a giant flip flop above his head.
Sing it brother! Sing it for the flip flop!
Um, honey?
I think that woman was trying to light your hair on fire.
Please don’t go there again. I don’t care if they have a giant flip flop stapled to the ceiling.
Just don’t go there anymore.
Please.
wow.
megan has a really shiny, puffy coat!
I feel inspired… I’m going to plan a trip up to see you guys JUST so you can take me there.
And Kiala, why are you always nursing a hangover? You need to modify your drinking technique. I’d suggest a large slab of barely cooked steak to start with.
Ashley, doesn’t it kind of look like scrubs?
Bet you could find it at some kind of, uh, scrubs store. Good luck!
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