We’re a little broken here today at The Hesselbees.

We did have a good time last night but I had three Nightlighters and two Vodka/Izze Pear Sodas. A Nightlighter is Vanilla Stoli, Godiva Chocolate Liqueur, and Starbucks Coffee Liqueur chilled, shaken and served up with a Hershey’s Kiss. It is the booziest, girliest drink ever, but because of it’s dark color and the absence of any sugar on the rim, it doesn’t look super embarrassing when you drink it. Maybe.

Anyway, that was A LOT of alcohol and I don’t even remember half of what was said to me or what I did. I mean, I remember but it’s all pretty hazy, especially after the third Nightlighter. I may possibly have insulted someone’s taste or mother or race? Also, I think I came home with things in my bag that weren’t in there when I left. Sorry The Press Club!

It was nice to hang out with Dave again, even though we didn’t talk much and honestly at that point, normal speech was impossible anyway.

And Dave is a Sea Captain now which is good because that Gang of Four thing wasn’t really panning out so it’s best we let the briny deep take him into her watery bosom.

Mostly, what I remember is me talking at Justin for like, oh, 300 minutes about…mmm…something? I have no idea? Anais Nin? I think, yes. I think Anais Nin. And Henry Miller. And then his eyes glazed over and he punched me.

No, no, he didn’t, but he SHOULD have.