Relationships are HARD.

Dane was not so impressed with the butternut squash. Then again, I don’t think he’d be impressed by anything not made entirely out of Frank’s Red Hot. Or soy sauce. In fact, if science could discover some kind of soy sauce/hot sauce vegetable, I would buy science a shot of Jagermeister. Or Goldschlager. Science is totally a drunk sorority girl. You heard it here first.

Today I have to go across town on the Burnside Bus (sticky) to the Mercury Offices in NE Portland. I’ve been there twice now and I think the office manager is beginning to warm up to me. The first time I came in, I made the mistake of looking him directly in the eyes, which as we all know, is an invitation to THE THUNDERDOME.

But the second time he greeted me with a delicate lift of one eyebrow and an almost imperceptible nod of the head.

Have you ever been hit with a Care Bear Stare? It was just like that. Only with more love.

I think today instead of saying hello, I’ll just wrestle him to the ground and lick his face. No, no, don’t try to stop me. I’m going with my gut on this one.